New Restaurant 1: Greek Food

A group of people at work have started a new tradition of going to lunch every Friday somewhere "new".  Not new to everyone, but not one of the regular fallbacks.  The goal is to have tried every restaurant in the area at least once.  Last Friday the pick was Zorbas.  I had heard about it plenty from those who raved about their lunch salads and while I am neither a fan of lamb nor cucumbers, I wasn't thrilled at the choice but game.  It is, after all, the nature of the "try something new" beast.  Still, when I opened the menu...well...it was Greek to me...literally.  I had tried a bite of a gyro (yee-rho...the menu instructed) before, but wasn't too impressed.  So, I decided that I would go with a chicken skewer on rice, as it sounded safe and cucumber free.  The waitress we were bestowed was less than thrilled to be at work and upon receiving my uncertain order, began to rattle off the types of rice I had to choose from.  She didn't even say basmati which was the one in the description.  I looked back and forth from the menu to her, looking for some written rice list, feeling absolutely lost and somehow pressured by her clear displeasure.  At this point I can't remember any of the words she had said and was scared to move ahead into the sauce options if I had, so I blurt out, "I want a chicken gyro".  I don't want a chicken gyro.  I hate gyros.  And their GY-ros.  Not yee-rhos.  Saying yee-rhos just sounds dumb.  Like people who say burritos with the rolled r or try to use English words like loo.  The more seasoned had ordered an appetizer of humus which basically looks like albino bean dip.  Outside of the random olive and the questionable liquid drizzled on top, it wasn't too bad when smeared upon pita.  I wouldn't say I loved it, but at minimum it was a Like Minus.  Then came the salad.  It is hard to explain as it was definitely not lettuce and was chopped.  As though you had diced lettuce into small pieces and then ate it with a spoon.  The gentleman who ordered it offered me a bite.  The best way to describe it was that it tasted like something that was meant to go into something else.  Like cream cheese.  Now, that would be good on a pita.  The panic ordered gyro was not great but I liked the fries, the least Greek thing in the place.  At the end of the day, I am just not an adventurous eater.  It is not the different culture thing, but more the complicated thing.  I don't want something in a paste or with an olive or with a meat whose fleece was white as snow.  I just want a piece of normal meat and some plain rice.  Maybe some mashed potatoes or sweet potato fries.  The chicken on a stick would have been great...I would guess.  I mean, it is reserved for only those well versed in rice and you just can't get more elite than that.